Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Circle of Influence, Circle of Concern

This life is what we make it.  Or so we've been told in movies, by our mentors, teachers and parents.  Yep, this life IS what we make it.  There are many paths we can choose, many experiences to be had---and all that other cliche stuff.  I guess the truth behind our own lives, and the control that we have over it, sometimes can be overwhelming.  As I continue to find myself in the aftermath of the mess that I've been living in for the past three months, it's been hard to accept that I have control over my own happiness.  Despite all of the bad things that have happened, I need to know and believe that I have the power to make myself in other ways.  Thus, the Circle of Influence and the Circle of Concern have come into play. 

The Circle of Concern-
Often, we spend our time worrying about things outside our circle of influence.  These are the things we cannot control.  For example we can worry about world hunger, war or even all of the people out there afflicted with illness.  However, as awful as these things are--we cannot spend the time worrying about them because we can't control them.  We cannot influence them.  They exist and will always exist because these are problems that not even the world's smartest person can solve.  

The Circle Of Influence:
While it is common to worry about the things we cannot control, there is so much that we don't realize we can control.  Don't like the way you look?  Change it.  Don't like your job?  Find a new one. Can't stand your boyfriend? Break up with him.  There are so many things that we can't control.  Yet there are elements within our life, right before our very eyes--that we can control.  

This life is what I make it. Regardless of all the shit that happens, this life is what I make it.  I feel a lot of things, and I worry more about the the stuff I cannot control than I do the things I can.  I worry that I am going to be alone forever.  I know that it's stupid for me to worry about that---and I know that love finds you when you least expect it.  I just can't help but feeling lonely in that way.  So, I've turned my focus to fitness.  It's something that I haven't been able to remain consistent in.  I started Crossfit yesterday, and I am hoping that the feeling I experienced after Crossfit turns into an addiction that I can't shake.  All I want is to feel better.  Feel better about me, feel better about who I am and what I stand for.  Maybe once that happens; maybe once I love myself then I can find love.  

So, I'm making my life.  I can't promise I am always going to feel the happiest--but I can try.


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