Over the summer, I went to a fortune teller at the Bristol
Renaissance Faire. Firstly, I’d like to
say I have always been a bit leery of this kind of pageantry. Secondly, as an educated human being, I would
also like to say that perhaps the odds of these individuals being legitimate in
an environment such as the Renaissance Faire are slim. Nevertheless, a week after my birthday, I was
feeling like I needed some kind of indication as to what was in store for me.
So I took a risk. All day long I told my
friends “Guys, I want to see the Palm Reader/Tarot Card Reader/Fortune Teller.”
I paid $20.00. I got
ripped off. I waited for 20 minutes until
1 of the 2 ‘Fortune Tellers’ beckoned me
to come over. So she set out all of
these cards, and started talking:
First Card:
FT: “Are you engaged?”
Me: “No.”
FT: “Were you engaged?”
Me: “No.”
So immediately we can
see that this is going nowhere.
I am not even certain where she was going with it, because
she sort of dismissed the card after I answered both of those questions.
Next Card:
FT: “Do you have a brother?”
Me: “No.”
FT: “Oh……well do you have a sister that is sort of a Tom
Boy?”
Me: “Well, not really.
I mean she likes cars and motorcycles…but owns more pairs of shoes than
I do…”
FT: “I see, well she is going to try and make her finances
right in the world. She will take on new
endeavors that will allow her to make some money.”
BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ……
**Fortune Teller looks to her right, picks up her cell
phone, and begins to text.**
So, at this point, I have heard my sister’s fortune—and the
fortune teller is now texting.
Great. So she ends abruptly,
because she so isn’t in to this. No palm reading. Nothing.
FT: “How was your first ‘fortune telling’ experience?
Me:….pause….sigh…”Well, ummm, I guess what I am wondering
is, if I am going to be alone forever.”
The fortune teller takes her cards back out and sort of
swishes them around. She flips through them,
and pulls one out. I can’t remember what the image on it was.
FT: “You will find a man again, but he won’t be ‘the one.’”
(that’s great news…………….)
With that, I get up thank her, and walk away confused.
So there you have it. One week after my 26th
birthday, as I continued to feel the pressures of time—I desperately paid money
to a fake fortune teller in the hopes that my future will be revealed. I mean, really it was all in good fun for the
most part. However, as I was rapidly
approaching a year of being single, and the people around me continued to get
married, engaged and have babies---I began to feel the clock ticking away.
Time. It's our best friend and worst enemy. From the moment
we wake up in the morning until the moment we shut our eyes---our lives are
controlled by schedules, alarms and calendar events. Reminders that each moment
we experience.....is just as I referred to it: a moment. Time lives by its own
rules, and it waits for no man. Whether you like it or not, each day
passes with the expectation/obvious fact that every human ages, lives a life
and then passes. These are the harsh
realities of being human. We live and then we die.
I don’t want to focus on that, though. Although living and dying is part of life;
the way in which you play out those fleeting moments is really what makes the
life you live. We’re all pressed for time in some way or another. Lately, I’ve kind of been watching the world
go on around me. It’s like one of those
movie scenes, where the camera cuts to the main character standing in a busy
street or on a crowded side walk. The
character isn’t moving, but the rest of society hustles and bustles around that
person. The person observes, and watches as time passes. Through these observations I have realized
and noticed a few things:
·
Society often creates schedules and timelines
for people to adhere to. Although, I
think I am fortunate enough to live in a society that really doesn’t enforce
the timelines. Don’t rush life. The good and the bad will happen when they’re
meant to happen. That’s just the way the
universe works.
·
When you want something to come to you
quickly---it takes forever. Then, just
as soon as it was there, it’s gone.
·
Embrace the things that took forever to get to
you.
·
Make your own schedule(s)….but don’t LIVE by
them 100%. Understand that there has to
be give and take when it comes to time.
·
If you spend your entire life looking at the
watch, or the calendar, you might miss something truly fabulous.
·
In the infamous words of 38 Special: Hold on loosely, but don’t let it go….if you
cling too tightly…you’re gonna lose control.
I know what you’re thinking….more bulleted pieces of wisdom.
I guess I was inspired by the personal pressures I was putting on myself to
live up to what everyone else is doing.
After feeling pretty down about it for a day, I realized that perhaps it
just isn’t the right time. Not sure when
it will be, or if it ever will be. These
are questions that I cannot answer. I
thought that maybe my future could be seen through the eyes of someone else.
Then I remembered something. The future isn’t
meant to be seen. It’s there for a
reason. If we knew the future, then we
could try to change the outcome of what our path is meant to be. Tempting fate is a very dangerous business. So, I tempt the now, attempting to do
whatever it is I see fit in order to make myself happy. Being selfish feels
kind of good. Perhaps doing so will open
my eyes to the person I am and the person I want to strive to be.
