Revival

Easter Sunday.  It's all about renewal and the rising of Jesus Christ.  For some of us, Easter is a time where we celebrate our successes---in the sense that we might have successfully given something up for Lent.  For others, we might use it as a time of reflection. Unfortunately for some, we might think about how we tried to give something up for lent....and might have been  unsuccessful. Even so, I've thought about Easter this year, and gave up being sad for Lent.  I would love to say that I was 100% successful; however I would be lying if I said I was.  

Overall, I think that I did an amazing job.  I've had people tell me lately that they can see I am happier, just by my eyes.  They don't look so sad anymore.  I feel like I need to keep that up.  It's been one of the hardest things that I've had to conquer.  The sadness.  It has been very hard to not feel inadequate, ugly, unimpressive and ordinary.  The more I think about all of those things I just listed....the more and more I think about how it's so possible to project those feelings to make that all actually true.  I am none of that.  Yes, I said it.  I am none of that.  I am not sure how long it is going to take before I actually believe it....but I need to keep saying it.  

Sometimes, the more we tell ourselves something....the more apt we are to believe it.

Looks like I'll be talking to myself quite a bit these days.....

A.